Tag Archives: depression

Perfectly Picked

chick picked 2

Yesterday was one of those days that I allowed myself to seep into depression. No reason really… it was just a handy place to be. I could have a woe is me pity party with all the feasts and trimming and there was no one to call my hand on it because I didn’t invite anyone else to join me. Oh, Izidora the Chihuahua occasionally tried to cheer me up, but her attention span is about as long as mine…. Is that a squirrel?

One  small advantage of having that “oooo something shiny” attention span is that it doesn’t allow me to hang out in a pity party too long; that would take focus. So this morning was a new day and my focus was a little more to the brighter side of life as I got out my guitar and began strumming  through the pages of a new song book titled “Parking Lot Picker’s Songbook.” If you’re not a bluegrasser you’re likely reading that title with bewilderment, or you think it’s a flea market guide. What it is is a book filled with old time bluegrass and gospel songs that “pickers” pick in parking lots at festivals and such. It’s probably the best collection of tunes I’ve seen compiled to date. Yes, that was an oooo something shiny moment. But it did have purpose. In that book is an old standard hymn “Have Thine Own Way.” As I played and sang it this morning “Methodist Style” (meaning I sang all four verses) Baptist usually only sing first and last, it blessed my soul!

Have Thine own way, Lord! Have Thine own way!
Thou art the Potter, I am the clay.
Mold me and make me after Thy will,
While I am waiting, yielded and still.

Have Thine own way, Lord! Have Thine own way!
Search me and try me, Master, today!
Whiter than snow, Lord, wash me just now,
As in Thy presence humbly I bow.

Have Thine own way, Lord! Have Thine own way!
Wounded and weary, help me, I pray!
Power, all power, surely is Thine!
Touch me and heal me, Savior divine.

Have Thine own way, Lord! Have Thine own way!
Hold o’er my being absolute sway!
Fill with Thy Spirit till all shall see
Christ only, always, living in me.

It’s a standard hymn, but it’s not a standard of living today is it? We want it our own way, and yesterday. But reading through those words, written by obvious divine inspiration, my heart that had been so “me” focused yesterday, softened like butter on a hot biscuit! God has so richly blessed me with time. Time to sing, pray, study, serve… and yes… whine. That story is not new either.

Isaiah 58:12-14 reads ~ And they that shall be of thee shall build the old waste places: thou shalt raise up the foundations of many generations; and thou shalt be called, The repairer of the breach, The restorer of paths to dwell in. If thou turn away thy foot from the sabbath, from doing thy pleasure on my holy day; and call the sabbath a delight, the holy of the Lord, honourable; and shalt honour him, not doing thine own ways, nor finding thine own pleasure, nor speaking thine own words: Then shalt thou delight thyself in the Lord; and I will cause thee to ride upon the high places of the earth, and feed thee with the heritage of Jacob thy father: for the mouth of the Lord hath spoken it.

Israel was a chosen nation that continually tried to have it their own way, when all God wanted was for them to choose Him and His way and He would have given it all…

He hasn’t changed.

  • I am chosen by Christ.
  • I am challenged by His Spirit
  • I am charged by His Word.

I’m not perfect, but I was perfectly picked! Have Thine own way Lord…

The Overcomer’s Club

Let me premise this blog by stating that I’m not a psychologist, or expert in mental health. I did however stay at the Stonewall Jackson Resort this week, which may qualify me in some manner as much as some of those “experts” that I’ve heard speak. I understand depression from the victim’s point of view, being one who has struggled with it for years and since salvation in 1996 have not mastered, but managed my own through relying on God’s grace to pull me through. That sounds all pious and religious, but in truth just means that I quit trying to fix it on my own and began asking God to help me through it. Each time was different, sometimes were darker than others. It varied from a nightlight of hope to a dimly lit room, it was never utter darkness for me, because in Christ I truly did have light, even though it was sometime shrouded by the trouble of the day.

If you struggle with depression this blog will not fix you, its 710 word after all. How far can that take you? What I hope it does is to “turn up the light” a little in your life today. J

.B. Phillips, author of Your God is Too Small, dealt with depression all of this life. In one of his many letters he offered this comment to someone struggling with depression. “As far as you can, and God knows how difficult this is, try to relax in and upon Him. As far as my experience goes, to get to even a breath of God’s peace in the midst of pain is infinitely worth having.”

For me that “breath of God’s peace” was my nightlight in dark times. In my heart I knew that “God had this.”, my head however would sometimes join the liars club and berate me with thoughts of defeat and discouragement. That’s Satan at his finest isn’t it? If you’re a Christian he can’t get into your heart, because Christ dwells there. So in the very core of you there is always a light. But in your mind, where the world can seep in, Satan has free reign to beat his drum and loud and long he will until you’re spiraling into the direction of depression.

So how do you spiral out?

Again… I’m not an expert. This is what works for me. I place myself in the winner’s circle with those who God’s shown me battled depression.

  1. The woman of Samaria in John 4 who came to the well in the heat of the day to avoid the judgmental eyes of society and met the one true Judge, who didn’t condemn her but loved her out of the lifestyle she as in.
  2. Moses wanted to die in Exodus 32:32, asking God to blot his name out of the book because of what the children of Israel had done with the golden calf – yet, he was the greatest leader ever known.
  3. 3.      Elijah sat down under a juniper tree in I Kings 19:4 and told God “It is enough; now, O Lord, take my life.”  The same Elijah who had brought fire down from Heaven.
  4. 4.      King David, my hero in the faith in Psalm 6:6 said I am weary with my groaning; all the night make I my bed to swim; I water my couch with my tears.
  5. 5.      The widow in I Kings 17:12 who had come to the end of her finances and was prepared to die a death of starvation with her child, when God sent an endless supply of provision.

The overcomers club! There were times that they had self-inflicted depression and other times it came from the outside, just like mine. But God brought them through! None of them were perfect, their sins rivaled the worst, and yet God’s mercy and grace is shown all over them. It is in those stories that I come to the “Why not me?” phase of healing. If God did it for them, why not me? They were just ordinary, messed up people, just like me.

I’m not an expert at much, but I may be nearing the benchmark of an expert in failures. But… God’s got me covered. Amen!