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This is a message to myself, but come along as I talk to God about my own life, and the weariness of my soul and body. My mind is already tired when I get up from the things I lie in bed and ponder. This world’s a mess!

What is it about 2024 that is so much different than 1996. That was the year of my salvation. To this day I have not lost my zeal for the word of God. Oh how it stirs my soul. But my zeal isn’t always translated to my time in the Word of God, which is a sad indictment against myself and a huge part of the problem with my weary, exhausted self. So you may wonder how the Word of God could physically and mentally encourage you? I assure you it does.

Hebrews 4:12
For the word of God is quick, and powerful, and sharper than any twoedged sword, piercing even to the dividing asunder of soul and spirit, and of the joints and marrow, and is a discerner of the thoughts and intents of the heart.

The word “quick” means that the word of God is alive! It speaks in return to the person reading the words on the page. It has the power to lift a burdened soul from the pit of depression, frustration or heartache. I’ve suffered all three for several years. When I changed churches 14 months ago, I thought that would fix it. My spiritual needs were being satisfied, I was active again in the ministry, but the prior years of struggling spiritually had set a pathway that I walked every day that was hard to break free from. Perhaps you too can identify with the feeling that the world has taken over life to the point that your days seem to accomplish little more than tasks for getting from 7 a.m. to 7 p.m., rest a few hours, go to bed, repeat.

Lord… I am weary.

Come unto me, all ye that labour and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest.

Matthew 11:28

I can quote the scripture. I know it’s true. Why hasn’t it helped? When I say the world has taken over my life, it’s not a metaphor. It feels as though the world has a to do list laid out for me from the time my feet hit the floor. I’m almost robotic in how I live life, and yet I get very little worthwhile things accomplished leaving me in that state of depression, despair and frustration. The only thing that changes my direction and thought process is the Word of God. But I am hit and miss to say the least.

It’ll cut you! Slice your heart wide open and expose every evil thought within in it. But that’s not all it does. When I say it’s sharp, I also mean like a sharp dressed man. The word of God makes me feel like I’m sitting in the presence of the King!!! Oh yeah, I am! I’m awestruck by the depth of God’s wisdom that pours into my soul like an oil from my essential oil boxes and anoints my heart with this soothing balm that flows into the broken cracks and crevices created by the world.

So why am I still so broken?

Because I haven’t sit still long enough to allow the oil of gladness to seep into me.

Psalm 45:6-8 KJV
Thy throne, O God, is for ever and ever: the sceptre of thy kingdom is a right sceptre. [7] Thou lovest righteousness, and hatest wickedness: therefore God, thy God, hath anointed thee with the oil of gladness above thy fellows. [8] All thy garments smell of myrrh, and aloes, and cassia, out of the ivory palaces, whereby they have made thee glad.

It’s ironic that God has given me so many gifts in my life both physically and spiritually. I know how to right this wrong that I have been suffering through. Satan cannot control the child of God. He has given us the power to overcome the world.

1 John 4:4 KJV
Ye are of God, little children, and have overcome them: because greater is he that is in you, than he that is in the world.

The issue isn’t with the word of God, it’s the fact that the word of God has not been center in my life. This word is how God speaks. Not the only way…. He speaks to my heart. He speaks when I pray. But when I read the word of God, it’s as if He and I had just sat down at the table with a cup of coffee and piece of cake and He poured into me something so very sweet that I left the cake on the table. And I love cake! That sweetness is a new to do list. He shut the world off and suddenly my vision and purpose was as clear as crystal. The oil of gladness filled the cracks and crevices created by the world and its to do list. The to do list that kept me away from the word of God.

This morning I’m still struggling. I’m still the Jesus Chick. The woman God called with a purpose to speak and share the Word of God with others. But I felt as though my betrayal of God’s word was an unpardonable sin. It wasn’t. But it separated me from Him and did not allow the oil of holiness to do what it does.

Isaiah 61:2-3 KJV
To proclaim the acceptable year of the LORD, and the day of vengeance of our God; to comfort all that mourn; [3] To appoint unto them that mourn in Zion, to give unto them beauty for ashes, the oil of joy for mourning, the garment of praise for the spirit of heaviness; that they might be called trees of righteousness, the planting of the LORD, that he might be glorified.

There is an oil of gladness and an oil of joy. Joy comes regardless of circumstance. Happiness is often fleeting. But joy is that oil that not only flows into the broken and cracked surface but heals what’s broken… that’s what I felt this morning as I studied His word. I felt the oil of joy softening my heart. Restoring it and comforting me where the world’s sword had sliced me open and left me to die. Dramatic? No. That does not even begin to describe the depth of heart ache I’ve been experiencing.

Are you there too? If my words encouraged you, please encourage me in return by letting me know. This is where I need to be every day, all day, experiencing the oil of joy.

In His love and for His glory, your sister in Christ Jesus, Shari Johnson. The Jesus Chick.

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