Category: Life’s Failures

Posted in Bible Journaling, failure, Faith, Life Inspiration, Life's Failures, Uncategorized

What to Do when the Lines are Blurred

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The Christian life is forever a grand adventure. That’s a quote from my friend Chief. He and I have one common ground that forever gets us into trouble. We leap believing a net will appear. Sometimes it does, and sometimes it doesn’t. But it always an adventure. Sometimes those adventures take their toll on me spiritually because the line between living in faith and living in the flesh is sometimes blurred for a personality such as mine. You see, my first action is reaction to any thought. Any. That’s a problem.

God said in Philippians 4:6 ~  Be careful for nothing; but in every thing by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known unto God.

Be careful for nothing means to “not worry.” It doesn’t mean don’t be cautious, which is often how I live my life. In ministering to myself this morning I need to unpack a few scriptures to get myself back into the adventurous living of Christ. The issue is this, if you leap enough times and the net doesn’t appear, the impact is painful.

The impact of broken dreams

I’m a dreamer. Oh my stars am I a dreamer! And if I’m honest being a dreamer is often an escape from reality. But when those dreams lie shattered on the ground because they didn’t come to pass as I thought they would, the impact is often for me to physically and emotionally shutdown. I usually do one of two things. (1) I shut down. Turn off the world and retreat inside my head which can be a very scary place. (2) Make someone else’s dream happen, in a very small sense of the word. Meaning I take on a thousand projects of a thousand people who are readily available to ask me to do something. (3) Quite often my last resort, I turn to the word of God. It’s where faith and flesh collide.

The impact of broken confidence

I’m familiar with failure. It’s a part of the life of someone who lives the “leap and the net will appear” mentality. Failure has never stopped me from trying again. But what will most assuredly shatter my confidence is when my leaping appears to the world as recklessness. And sometimes to me as recklessness. I restore that confidence in remembering the countless miracles that God has done in my life, but even they too were often God rescuing me from a not so very well thought out plan. So thus, it’s a vicious cycle. God however has confidence builders on call, like my best friend and biggest fan, Gloria. Or my friend Jessica, who spurred my spirit on by recalling how I had made a difference for her as she spoke at a ladies meeting Monday night.  And my friend Dewey who calls just to check on me, who consoles my spirit and reminds me quite often that The Jesus Chick needs to stay on the path God designed. Confidence too is where faith and flesh collide.

The impact of broken spirit

Probably the hardest of all is when the flesh wins out over faith and I feel uninspired to go on. It’s when I’ve taken a hit from several directions. It’s not that the Word has let me down or that the encouragers in my life have let me down, it’s when the world has taken its toll and I don’t even have the desire to walk to the edge, never mind jumping off to another adventure. It’s where I’ve been of late.

So how do you fix a broken spirit?

Psalm 51:17

The sacrifices of God are a broken spirit: a broken and a contrite heart, O God, thou wilt not despise.

You offer it to God. Part of being in the ministry is realizing the paycheck doesn’t look like the 9-5 job. There’s usually not a paycheck. The pay is presenting the gifts that God has given you to Him and through Him, and allowing Him to tell you your worth.

Paul (the writer of Philippians) and David (the writer of most of the Psalms) had much in common. Both understood that the power behind the child of God is in prayer, supplication and thanksgiving. It is with an attitude of brokenness and contriteness (remorse) that God can use us. It’s where faith and flesh part.  The flesh wants no part of regret or remorse. The flesh wants no part of being broken. But in that state is where I find my strength to leap again. Because in that state I realize that my dreams, confidence and desires are through Him, and it will be through Him that success will come. And it will.

Philippians 1:6

Being confident of this very thing, that he which hath begun a good work in you will perform it until the day of Jesus Christ:

This ministry is fueled on the love of God, but if you’d like to help fund it please click the link below:

https://thejesuschick.com/pray-and-consider-supporting-this-chick/

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Posted in Bible Journaling, Christian Service, Life Inspiration, Life's Failures

How To Make a Lemonade Life Out of Lemons

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life

Solomon is said to be the wisest man to have ever lived, and I don’t doubt it. His words were salve to my troubled soul this morning. I don’t understand why God chooses to allow this world to continue in the state that it’s in. I’ve never seen so much evil. I’ve never felt the fierceness of sin trying to turn my own mind away from God such as I do right now. The closer I try to get to God the greater the oppression of the enemy on my soul and the vexation of my spirit. So to hear that even the wisest of men struggled with that understanding gives me some comfort in the fact that I’m not alone in my search for peace.

There is something about the tartness of a lemon that has always been a metaphor in life. Very few people would bite into that fruit and pleasure in the experience. It’s a jaw puckering, eye quivering, taste like no other. But squeeze the juice out of those babies into a pitcher, dilute it with water and add the sweetness of sugar and it’s a whole new day! The sour is overcome, the taste buds dance and the soul is made happy in a beverage. The lemon is no longer looked upon as a painfully sour fruit but rather something to be savored.

A bite out of life sometimes yields the same result. A piece of my day viewed from the perspective of just a brief period of time is bitter, and harsh. The pain sears my spirit. It’s too much to consume. Broken dreams are like an unsweetened lemon. I try to grab hold of faith, reign in my thoughts but the bitter, sour taste has my eyes closed and teeth clenched. I can’t see anything sweet, I only taste the lemon.

Ecclesiastes 5, the words of Solomon, had a lemonade making effect on my life today and wise advice:

Living the Dream!

Ecclesiastes 5:1-3 Keep thy foot when thou goest to the house of God, and be more ready to hear, than to give the sacrifice of fools: for they consider not that they do evil. Be not rash with thy mouth, and let not thine heart be hasty to utter any thing before God: for God is in heaven, and thou upon earth: therefore let thy words be few. For a dream cometh through the multitude of business; and a fool’s voice is known by multitude of words.

We all long for the dreamlife; the one without heartache, sorrow and struggles. But that dream is almost always mingled with a few nightmares. Stay focused. Keep your footing in the house of God where the Word of God is preached, a support system is in place and an accountability program in effect. Listen more and talk less. Work harder and be idle less. Satan is full of ideas that he loves to share with busy people trying to make things happen. Be not hasty with decisions, it almost always leads to heartache. I have worn that shirt many times!

Leave the Lies

Ecclesiastes 5:4-7

When thou vowest a vow unto God, defer not to pay it; for he hath no pleasure in fools: pay that which thou hast vowed. Better is it that thou shouldest not vow, than that thou shouldest vow and not pay. Suffer not thy mouth to cause thy flesh to sin; neither say thou before the angel, that it was an error: wherefore should God be angry at thy voice, and destroy the work of thine hands? For in the multitude of dreams and many words there are also divers vanities: but fear thou God.

So, so many times I’ve dreamed dreams and said to God, “God, if only You’ll do this, I’ll do this.” God’s not in to empty promises.  Solomon words advise us to keep our dreamlife in perspective. Fear God more than fearing failure. Failing isn’t always the problem, refusing to admit you failed and moving on is often the problem. When God doesn’t allow a dream to come to pass, perhaps that was your dream not His. Or perhaps you didn’t work hard enough at the dream. “That” is life in perspective for me. Be honest with yourself. God already knows.

So what then? What do we do when life doesn’t turn out the way we anticipated?

Learning the Lesson

A brief and incomplete summary of verses 8-17 is that even when we do life as best we can, reality can still be harsh, heartaches can still come, and the dream may or may not be fulfilled. Money won’t buy happiness, life is brief, and we’ll take nothing with us when we die. But understand that God was there through it all and through it all there was a purpose.

The lesson to be learned is this, the dream is not the achievement, the dream is the process that leads to success.

Ecclesiastes 5:18-20 ~ Behold that which I have seen: it is good and comely for one to eat and to drink, and to enjoy the good of all his labour that he taketh under the sun all the days of his life, which God giveth him: for it is his portion. Every man also to whom God hath given riches and wealth, and hath given him power to eat thereof, and to take his portion, and to rejoice in his labour; this is the gift of God. For he shall not much remember the days of his life; because God answereth him in the joy of his heart.

Posted in Bible Journaling, Life Inspiration, Life's Failures

The trouble with both of my marriages

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lamentations

On August 16, 1980 I became the wife of David Wayne Johnson. And in the year 1996, when I accepted Jesus Christ as my Savior, I became a member of the bride of Christ, which is the church.

Revelation 19:7

Let us be glad and rejoice and give glory to him; for the marriage of the Lamb is come, and his bride has made herself ready.

On more than one occasion the church is referred to as the bride. It’s a depiction of union of the believers with God, and what a great picture! The marriage of a man and woman is a relational picture as well between we who are saved and God. It’s a covenant relationship which unfortunately on earth is marred, and often broken. But the relationship with God is not ever broken because He is perfect and aware of our every flaw; yet He loves us unconditionally any way. I am perfect! In Christ Jesus. I am ever so flawed in Shari Lynn Johnson.

Marriage may be easy for some, but it’s never been easy for me. There’s too much me involved in it. So as I read the scripture in 1 Peter 3:1-4 this morning about the behavioral expectation of the wife, my heart was pricked to say the least.

Likewise, ye wives, be in subjection to your own husbands; that, if any obey not the word, they also may without the word be won by the conversation of the wives; While they behold your chaste conversation coupled with fear. Whose adorning let it not be that outward adorning of plaiting the hair, and of wearing of gold, or of putting on of apparel; But let it be the hidden man of the heart, in that which is not corruptible, even the ornament of a meek and quiet spirit, which is in the sight of God of great price.

So let’s go down my checklist of failing issues:

  • In subjection
  • Chaste conversation
  • Outward adorning
  • Wearing of gold
  • Putting on of apparel
  • Meek
  • Quiet

Wow. I highly doubt any of those would be on a list if you asked David to give adjectives that described his wife. I’m a rebellious spirited, loud mouth, make-up loving, sparkly clothes and jewelry wearing gal whose meek and quiet spirit is only revealed if the Holy Spirit is sitting on top of me. But… God loves me anyway. He also uses me anyway – which never shocks anyone as much as it does me. But the words this morning from this text drew me in when I read, “but let it be the hidden man of heart, in that which is not corruptible.”

No matter how hard I try being that perfect wife to David Johnson, I can’t. He would tell you that I try but fail miserably. But there is a hidden Shari that is perfect. It is the one that is hidden in Christ Jesus. That turned my thought process this morning in a 180° turn. When God looks at me, He does not look up on the loud, blingy babe that the world looks upon. He looks at the blood covered heart of a woman of God who believes she was redeemed on the cross of Calvary and walks and talks with Jesus on her way to the wedding supper of the Lamb.

In Christ Jesus there is no rebellion – Oh, I try. But He draws me back in and puts a desire in my heart to please Him and serve Him, as well as please and serve my husband David.

In Christ Jesus I am beautiful – with or without makeup Christ looks at me and sees the inward Shari. The one that is real. The one that is still a little girl at heart with dreams and passions that I still believe I’ll see come to fruition.

In Christ Jesus my fashion sense is irrelevant, because He’s placed a robe in glory that He’ll adorn me with when I get home that will top my most favorite outfit here on earth and it will be the perfect size that I’ll likely never achieve on earth.

I seldom view myself in the perspective of Christ Jesus, because this marred human nature of mine would rather I live in subjection to self, not Christ. And self is a failure. But today I begin again. Anew, just as the scripture says in Lamentations 3:22-23 ~ It is of the Lord‘s mercies that we are not consumed, because his compassions fail not. They are new every morning: great is thy faithfulness.

The trouble with both of my marriages is me. It is the mercy of the Lord that He does not consume me with fire each day! Praise God His mercy is new every morning and I can begin again. Great is His faithfulness!

Having trouble seeing yourself from Christ’s vantage point? Find that meek and gentle spirit within yourself and listen very closely to what God has to say… shhhhhhh.

Posted in Christian Service, Evangelism, Life Inspiration, Life's Failures

Not Listening is Dangerous!

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chick feast

So I find the story in the book of Samuel, chapter 13 of the character of Saul. Saul, an ordinary, (though tall) fella, who God has given a job. And not just any job! The job of being the very first King of Israel.

Once Saul took office he had called up 3,000 men; 2000 of which were under his leadership and 1,000 under the leadership of his son Jonathan.  Not long after this, his son Jonathan killed a garrison (a troop) of Philistines and their people were upset. Upset enough to get 30,000 chariots and 6,000 horsemen together to attack Israel.

This was Saul’s first big test of leadership. But he only had 3,000 people. So Israel ran and hid in their tents and caves and bushes, anywhere they could because they were sure they were just about to get slaughtered.

Saul is in Gilgal, where Samuel, the man of God had told him to wait for seven days and he’d be there to offer a sacrifice. They’d have a prayer meeting before the battle, always a good idea!

But Samuel doesn’t come at the hour that Saul expected. So Saul does something really stupid and takes matters in his own hands. (I have worn that shirt too many times to count!)

1 Samuel 13:9-10

And Saul said, Bring hither a burnt offering to me, and peace offerings. And he offered the burnt offering. And it came to pass, that as soon as he had made an end of offering the burnt offering, behold, Samuel came; and Saul went out to meet him, that he might salute him.

Saul was excited to see Samuel… For a minute. Until he realized that Samuel wasn’t any too happy that Saul had done a job that God had appointed him to do.

Saul’s job was King. Samuel’s job was sacrifice.

As I’m reading this, as I often do, my mind is in other places. “God, over and over again I ask Your plan, and over and over again I think I have direction and then, life just doesn’t work. What now?” And in between my reading, talking, writing and Attention Deficit Disorder living I can almost feel God roll His eyes at me again.

And then it happens. I whine. “Seven years, I’ve been here waiting. Seven years!  (as if God didn’t hear me the first time) In 2010, God in no uncertain terms said. “Quit your job, and serve me.”

And I just couldn’t see how it would work. So I’ve been hired, fired, wired and tired for seven years. Not in a good place. I’ve doubted myself. Others have doubted my calling, I’ve worked for nasty people and nice people and although I’m a little further down the road, I don’t feel that I’m very far. Again and again, I’ve tried to go back into the secular world of work, and it won’t happen.

But right at this point of whining I almost feel a Gibbs slap to the back of the head. (NCIS television show terminology there.) And God saying did you even listen to what you read? For seven days Saul waited for Samuel and then decided to take things into his own hands and because of that he lost it all. Seven days, or seven years, it doesn’t matter. I have to be the one controlling your life, else this is not going to work. Those jobs you’re applying for belong to someone else, stop trying to do them.

So that was His message for me today… I have a job. It’s to wait on God.

Saul lost the kingdom and he lost the peace of God. That’s how King David came into the picture as the second King of Israel, because he could play and sing for Saul and speak peace to his soul. There’s power in what I do. Although I don’t write like David, and I’m not the skilled musician he obviously was, it’s the job that God has given me. I need to stop trying to take someone else’s.

So to cap this story off, with something funny to tell, not funny to live… This past Sunday, someone on the music schedule wasn’t able to sing and they ask me to fill in on the fly. So I think, no prob! I’m trying to obey God and do what He’s ask so I take my guitar to church and I’m going to wow them with my singin’ and playin’. I couldn’t hit a chord to save my soul! Praise God, Jesus had already saved it. So I whine again… but God, You said if I did it, I’d be okay. He said, “I didn’t say it would be easy.” To which my response was “Did it have to be so dog gone embarrassing?”

I think God likes His people humble. And He knows my heart, I’m always trying to do it the short cut way. There’s not shortcut to God’s design.

I don’t have time to tell you of the blessings God has put in my path to make these things happen. People, instruments, tools of the trade of writing. God has a plan for each one of us and I believe if we listen it is clear ~ and not listening is dangerous! So listen the first time. It’ll go way easier for you! #ExperiencedFailure #GodLovesMeThisIknow

 

Posted in Bible Journaling, Faith, Life Inspiration, Life's Failures, Uncategorized

Satan’s Most Powerful Tool

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12117Whither shall I go from the Spirit? Whither shall I flee from Thy presence?

Psalm 139:7

Sometimes I confuse myself. I know the word of God, the power of God, the compassion of God, the omnipresence of God, and above all I know the forgiveness of God. But it seems when I’m at my wits end in life, and I’ve tried my last human effort; I still have one thing left to do. RUN! And the whole time I’m running I’m thinking… “There’s no sanity in this. God is my only hope.” But do I turn back? Nope! That makes way too much since and Satan is so, so very good at what he does. Convincing me that I am unworthy, defeated, or hopeless.

I’d like to tell you that after twenty years of salvation, and greater than 10 years of writing and studying the word of the Lord I’m above it. But I’m not. When David penned the words in Psalm 139 it was an affirmation. He was reminding himself that there was no where he could go that would put him out of God’s presence. There was no part of him that God did not know. There was nothing he had done that God had not seen. Hmmm…. That explains why I run. It’s called guilt. Its likely Satan’s most powerful tool on the child of God.

He has no power to control the child of God (unless we give it to him) because we have the Savior within our hearts. A spot that Satan cannot occupy. But he is still the prince of the air, and those air waves are very disheartening. David too much have understood that when he wrote in the same Psalm (vs. 16)  “Thine eyes did see my substance, yet being imperfect, and in thy book all my members were written, which in continuance were fashioned, when as yet there was none of them.”

Long before God created me, He knew who I would be. He knew I would fail. And yet it says in the following “How precious are thy thoughts unto me, O God! How great is the sum of them. If I should count them, they are more in number than the sand: when I awake, I am still with thee.”

That’s a humbling thing to know, that the Almighty God Who created the universe in all its splendor and has so much to do, takes time to think of me. That’s a word that the prince of the air doesn’t want you to know. He doesn’t want you to know that in the course of God’s day, whatever that might look like, I’m on His mind. I also wonder what He must have thought when I turned my back on Him.

Disheartened? No, being disheartened is to be discouraged, intimidated, downcast. None of which describes God. Here are just a few scriptures that tell us Who God is.

God’s thoughts are so much higher than I can imagine  ~ Isaiah 55:8–9

He does not grow weary, even of me! ~  Isaiah 40:28

He knows my hair better than my beautician! ~  Luke 12:7

Before I was born, He implanted His career design in me. Even knowing I would not do it justice. ~ Jeremiah 1:5

He is not partial to anyone more than me. ~  Deuteronomy 10:17

I always feel less and unworthy, both of which play into the hands of the prince of the air causing me to flee from God. When scripture tells me, I a loved, forgiven, planned and blessed by God. I hope you are wiser than I. Don’t buy the lies of Satan. They’re extremely expensive.

Posted in Bible Journaling, Christian Service, Life's Failures

Our Heart set Apart

Written by talk2shari Published Discussion 2 Comments on Our Heart set Apart

set-apart

My friend Gloria and I have traveled many, many miles together, some in a vehicle and some in the Spirit, growing in the grace of our Lord who we share as Father. Yesterday was one of those days. We spent several hours celebrating Jesus in the form of chatter, laughter, tears and food. Pretty much in that order and of equal importance to our spiritual health.

As we shared what scriptures we’d read and the significance to our day, Gloria shared the Nazarite vow and this morning it’s still fresh on my mind. The Nazarite vow comes from the Hebrew word “nazir” meaning consecrated or separated. It was a vow to abstain from specific things, for example wine, grapes, cutting of hair or to come into contact with a dead body, and much more. It was a set time and at the end of that time a sacrifice was made in great detail. None of the event was taken lightly. It was serious business. Oh, to have a Nazarite heart…

One set apart for the service of God. David said in Psalm 4:3

But know that the Lord hath set apart him that is godly for himself: the Lord will hear when I call unto him.

I want to be used by God and I want Him to hear my pleas. But I know I’m not nearly serious enough. I’m not referring to abstaining from wine (which I don’t drink anyway) or grapes or not cutting my hair. For me it’s a heart matter. I need a time of prayer, a time set aside and exclusively His each day.

Life goes on… I realize that. We have dishes to wash and work to do. But there needs to be a consecrated effort when we love on God, spending time one to One, in His presence; if we have any expectation of God doing a mighty work in our lives. And just like it was an outward appearance of the Nazarite that he was set apart, our friends and family should know that we’re setting ourselves apart from the world for a time. It’s not for a show, it’s for them to know that God is so important in my life that I’ve set this time apart for Him away from the things of the world.

For me its mornings, for you perhaps its another time of day. But more than the timeslot, it’s the consecrated effort that God sees we’re desiring Him to know that He is key in our lives.

Yes, the world needs to see Jesus, but Jesus needs to see us. Spend some time in His presence today, He alone is worthy

Posted in Bible Journaling, Christian Service, Faith, Leadership, Life Inspiration, Life's Failures

Fight On Weary Soldier

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johsua-3

A quick leadership thought, as I read through Joshua, gave me strength for the day that I thought I’d share. It’s amazing the difference a few days makes in outlook. I attribute it first to the Word of God and the Holy Spirit, and the vitamins I take… Don’t scoff… they do make a difference in my clarity of thought. But that’s not why I am here. I’m here to share this thought on leadership.

I love the story of Joshua! Such a mighty leader and one to look to for an example. The scripture that first caught my attention was Joshua 11:5 which said he left nothing undone. I can assure you that last week leaving things undone crossed my mind. I felt like a failure and my multi-tasking ways were crashing in around me. There’s much to do and leaving it undone, would be letting the Lord down. And as it says in Joshua 11:8, Joshua made war a long time. Why did I think that my success would be sooner than later? If Joshua, mighty man of valor and chosen of God fought long and hard for his success; I should expect no less. And it’s really not that I expect less, but I have fear and trepidation that I’m going to mess this thing up that the Lord has called me to do. And then I read And the Lord said unto Joshua, be not afraid because of them. And I realize that Joshua’s them may have not been the same of mine but God controls them all!

Those who are “them” may be people in my world, or self. I’m easily my worst critic and enemy. And so today I draw strength from God’s man Joshua and the Word that God left for such a time as we are in. Nobody said to me every day would be easy in the ministry. They told me it would be tough… I just prefer easy and thought God might make an exception. He did not. God like’s fighters. Those who feel the cause is worthy…

Fight on weary soldier! God’s got wonders to show us today.

Posted in Bible Journaling, Christian Service, Forgiveness, Leadership, Life Inspiration, Life's Failures

Don’t Limit God

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Spirit limit

If only I had failed God once and learned my lesson I’d consider myself in pretty good shape for the shape I’m in; that shape being a sinner saved by grace. But no, I have to again and again fail God, beg mercy, feel minty fresh for about 30 seconds and then sin again. Why are we such a fickle lot of people? Christian people that is. Am I alone? I’m pretty sure I’m not.

This past week a well-known preacher, Perry Noble, and one that I had followed, fell. I loved this guy. He wasn’t perfect and I didn’t agree with everything he said but I loved his style of preaching and his “realness.” The problem with being real is it also makes you pretty transparent. Because you’ll say anything. If it comes into your mind, it’s usually out of your mouth before you give a second thought.  This was his style. He was funny and charismatic and above all, thousands of souls came to know the saving grace of Jesus Christ through him. I believe that. His words stirred my soul and I believe God used Him. But he fell, because he, like I, am human. His transparency gave me a spiritual insight to him that said “proceed with caution.” He dabbled too close the snake pit, and that my friend has gotten many a preacher in trouble. Alcohol was his downfall, and I won’t even get started on that because I could write for days! And it’s not the point in this blog. My point is the limits we put on God is through sin’s hold. It’s not the sin itself, it’s the hold it get on us.

Israel let God down again and again. But His great mercy brought them through. Read what David said in Psalm 78

But he, being full of compassion, forgave their iniquity, and destroyed them not: yea, many a time turned he his anger away, and did not stir up all his wrath.  For he remembered that they were but flesh; a wind that passeth away, and cometh not again. How oft did they provoke him in the wilderness, and grieve him in the desert! Yea, they turned back and tempted God, and limited the Holy One of Israel.

Psalm 78:38-41

God understood Israel and He understands us. He knows we are weak vessels and that we fall, but the key is to move forward away from the snake pit. Turning back doesn’t stop God’s forgiveness… He’ll forgive again and again. But He won’t bless again and again. We limit Him. Even God has limits, they’re called “us.”

He desires to pour His blessings down upon us, bring revival into our church houses but our turning back puts a speed limit on the Holy Spirit. Turning back is different things for different people. For my preacher man that fell, he got too close a substance that fuels the fires of Hell. Alcohol. I hate it and everything it stands for. That was his sin, I have my own, and you have yours. And for the tribe of preachers that want to cast this preacher to the curb… God sees you too. God Who is full of compassion forgives, you who are full of pride will point and condemn the man God forgave.

My point to ponder is this: Don’t limit God. He forgave the sin, now move on. There’s a new speed sign up ahead that says “full throttle!”  Don’t turn back.

Posted in Bible Journaling, Life Inspiration, Life's Failures

Stop Building Towers

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babel

Have you ever wondered why life is full of confusion? Confusion abounds with constant decisions, constant noise and frustration ensues, at least in my world. Once upon a time there was simpler world and it seems to me that it was just yesterday. Growing up in the hills of West Virginia was a blessing. I know that there are a lot of folks who poke fun at hillbillies and can’t possibly understand why anyone would want to live in such an economically depressed area with little opportunity but it’s the place I call home.

Now back to my point on confusion and all this will hopefully come together to bless you and I both with  a little reasoning from God this sunny Saturday morning in the hills.

Why is decision making so hard and so frequent. It seems that I just get out of one decision and I’m onto the next. And we’re not talking about breakfast… which I haven’t even got around to today and that’s a pretty important decision. But I’m talking about decisions that can have life altering effects. Career, money, health, kids, and that’s just the beginning. The spiritual side of life is a whole other realm and more important than those mentioned before. So why is there confusion?

In the beginning is a good place to start. I’ve been journaling through Genesis this week and yesterday happed upon the tower of Babel in Chapter 11. Three things caught my eye about why God confounded the builders and why we have confusion today.

Genesis 11:1-8

And the whole earth was of one language, and of one speech. And it came to pass, as they journeyed from the east, that they found a plain in the land of Shinar; and they dwelt there. And they said one to another, Go to, let us make brick, and burn them thoroughly. And they had brick for stone, and slime had they for morter. And they said, Go to, let us build us a city and a tower, whose top may reach unto heaven; and let us make us a name, lest we be scattered abroad upon the face of the whole earth. And the Lord came down to see the city and the tower, which the children of men builded. And the Lord said, Behold, the people is one, and they have all one language; and this they begin to do: and now nothing will be restrained from them, which they have imagined to do. Go to, let us go down, and there confound their language, that they may not understand one another’s speech. So the Lord scattered them abroad from thence upon the face of all the earth: and they left off to build the city.

  • Nobody asked God
  • They just started building.
  • And so life was scattered.

Sound familiar?

Prayer a priority? Sounds like such a foreign idea to most people. And while I pray over a candy bar (mostly asking God not to let the calories count), a major decision will occur and I’ll half heartedly ask God’s guidance, truthfully having made up my mind already. And then I wonder why I’m confused about life. If the tower builders had ask God His opinion He would have told them not to waste their time. But they didn’t. They wanted to see what they could accomplish for themselves and by themselves and for their glory. Nothing but bad can become of that combination.

I have to wonder what thoughts ran through their minds when they began to speak different languages. I’m sure it was somewhat like me talking with my grandsons Logan and Parker who are just beginning to form words and sentences. I’m pretty sure I know what they said, but answering yes could possible result in Izzie the Chihuahua taking a bath in the dishwasher.

God’s words are much clearer than the grandboys, but sometimes every bit as confusing. And I’m pretty sure I know why…

It’s called the flesh. I want to do and accomplish “stuff.” And if God doesn’t open an immediate door I call it confusion, rather than just sitting back and waiting to see if perhaps that door should remain closed. Maybe that tower didn’t need built, that song didn’t need written or sung and that venue didn’t need to happen.

My resent invitation to Minnesota to minister in music with my dear friend Dewey Moede happened much like that. I have a God box that my friend Sue Walker gave me at a retreat a few years ago. Inside that box are prayers that I know I have no control over. Meeting Dewey Moede is one. Another prayer on my heart is that God would open doors for me to sing. Voila! That’s my God. But a trip to Minnesota costs money… I have no money… I stopped working because God told me too. But a good friend of Dewey’s who became a good friend of mine listened to God and provided me the funds for transportation to Minnesota. That’s what happens when you wait on God.

That’s one of my success stories, I have far more failure tales. Stop building towers. Stay grounded in prayer.

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Posted in Christian Service, Fear, Grace, Life Inspiration, Life's Failures, Uncategorized

It’s Only Bread

Written by talk2shari Published Discussion Leave a Comment on It’s Only Bread

Bread of Life

Mark 6

Jesus had just left his home town where (vs) He marveled because of their unbelief, He as just a carpenter’s son after all, how could He be so wise and do such marvelous works?  It was from there that He began sending His disciples out two by two, He’d given them power over unclean spirits and instructed them to leave with  nothing  and rely on God for provision, which they did without question. But then one of the many strange stories that have me shaking my head, until I look in the mirror.

The disciples were in the inner circle, they’d seen His miracles, they’d no doubt felt His frustration when the folks from His hometown rejected His message and were offended, they were willing workers in the gospel movement and are our heroes of the faith for many reasons. They were there that day when Jesus had greater than 5,000 people sit down on the lawn and eat to their full from 5 loaves of bread and two fishes, and then took up  the remnants of the meal to the tune of 12 baskets of bread! Glory to God what a service!

Jesus then sent the disciples in a ship to Bethsaida while He went to the mountain to pray. As evening comes the disciples were in the middle of the sea in high winds, and as they fight the storm they notice someone walking on the water, and they cried out in fear. That doesn’t surprise me. They’re human after all and that no doubt was a pretty scary time.  It’s what happens next that bothers me.

Jesus begins to talk to them and says “Be of good cheer: it is I; be not afraid.” (Vs. 50) He gets into the boat, the storm stops and they’re amazed, but they don’t know its Jesus, and then the scripture says its because  (vs. 52) they considered not the miracle of the loaves: for their heart was hardened.

The mirror flipped on me. How many times have I seen the miracles of God, witnessed them first hand in my life, watched God do the undoable, and then later sit in fear because of circumstances that are beyond my control. How many times have I heard the Holy Spirit speak to my heart and not recognize that it was the voice of Jesus? Too many…

It was only bread.

I hate the thought that my heart is hardened.  I want to believe that I am tender and pliable for the Holy Spirit to do a work in, but then struggles come and I sit in fear having the many miracles of grace and mercy in the recesses of my mind, ready to draw upon for strength, but it’s only bread. That was yesterday, this is today. Sad and true. My heroes of the faith are just like me. The present storm had taken their mind to place where they failed to recognize the voice of Jesus until they reached the safety of the shore.

God knows I’m human. He knows when I’m in the middle of the storm my attention span is short. He’d like me to be more faithful, but His word reminds me that it’s not the first time His people have let Him down. The question is, what are you going to do when the waves stop, or the dust settles?

Vs. 53-56

And when they had passed over, they came into the land of Gennesaret, and drew to the shore. And when they were come out of the ship, straightway they knew him, And ran through that whole region round about, and began to carry about in beds those that were sick, where they heard he was. And whithersoever he entered, into villages, or cities, or country, they laid the sick in the streets, and besought him that they might touch if it were but the border of his garment: and as many as touched him were made whole.

Get to work! God understands our human nature when the storms rage around us, but when the waves die down and the dust settles it’s time to remember that it wasn’t just bread. It was the Bread of Life making provision for our way and there are countless other people who need to see that God can bring them through too! When the disciples made it through the storm they hit the streets running, and didn’t just give lip service for the miracles of Christ, they brought the people to Him. And as many as touched Him were made whole. How many? As many… numbers are nothing with Jesus. 5,000-5 million… God can!